"Your too old to fix a hut dear! How about some food and a swim in the lagoon? Then you can prop yourself back at the dern table and GET ME SOME MORE POINTS!"

"Ok guys, I'll make ya a deal...5,000 more points and we'll all go swimming in the lagoon!"

"OMG, someone is dead. Where's that little Imp?" (I hold him in my "hand" while they carry the bones to the graveyard - if he throws a party before they get there they will drop my dearly departed and run off to dance! ggrrr)

"Your bored and worried about food and housing... you must be a teenager!"

"NOOOOOOO! Now look you got yourself knocked up AGAIN! Your 2 clicks from being a Master Doctor!" (I have one village with 58 Master Doctors...I'm obsessed, what can I say? )

I don't think so!
Get your tushy back here!
as my hand comes down and drags them back to where I want them.

Terri! Congrats on your story being posted! That is a wonderful story, and can't wait to read "the rest of the story." Link here if anyone missed it.

That is nuts, congrats on getting it posted, its a crazy but cool little story. I think everyone in some regards runs little stories in their heads while they play but to write it down and narrate a tribes history is pretty neat i must admit. Good job, its funny and i bet the creators agree at the things people do when they enjoy something. They were probably more than happy to post your story. I know if i created a game and someone wrote a story about it, i would be tickled. Again congrats...time to get off work!

"Oh, nuts. You're knocked up AGAIN? You just weaned a baby two minutes ago!"

Oh My God! She is having a baby at that age!
What if she dies before the baby is 2?

If a nursing mother dies, you will lose both villagers.

OMG I came here first time 3AM a few nights ago and laughed myself so silly I couldn't even join or write. I thought wow, I have found my people, all crazy too. I mean, besides all those little virtual ones I've "tended to" for weeks even in my sleep. Can't even wake up to pee without checking on them and attending funerals and orgies LOL. Or did I dream that too? My pc is next to the bed of course. Just in and out of reality too much lately. The line gets thinner huh?

Who was it above made me ROFL re trying to surf by trying to grab web pages to move them? You too? YES and can't find the scroll dial or arrow keys now on email either. Not that I have mail, haven't had time to reply to any. Tried to pry myself away to catch up on the weeks of game-induced slothe in my apartment and couldn't stop clutching my remote mouse imagining I had grabbed dishes and dropped them in the sink, and boxes by the door dropping them in the storage closet. Then it hit me - I thought OMG I have to get up and do that myself!! No! No!! uh uh. I feel so powerless without mouse in hand, I'm ruined. Hand was so paralyzed after 3 typhoons planting crops to harvest again it was welded to the dead mouse. Battery died then after 16 hours of it not resting in the cradle to recharge. So totally helpless just watching 22 more nursing moms pop up onscreen and unattended deceased. Was there a life before VV? Will I have one afterward or just the hereafter? I'll be 70 in 2 weeks. I think. Or is that 2 hours? Time flies when having fun YIKES!!

Started making a list of things I've said too but couldn't even stop that, way too long to post here, but maybe I can copy paste some at a time. Thanks all for the hilarity and for validating my insanity is "normal", well, here anyway.

btw one of my favs here was about the old lover "but he's got personality" LMAO, yep, someone I knew.

Okay, here's some of mine.

Why are you going to the cemetary to complain? Nobody's going to HEAR you.

Who coughed? You're a Master Doctor go find them. Hmmm guess it was ME then. Come heal my hand and shoulder from dragging all the clueless around.
One more typoon and I need a wrist brace Doc.

Three typhoons and THIS is the thanks I get. More babies to feed and carpal tunnel.

All those tech points I wasted, I buy you the best of science technology and you STILL can't make a fire??

I TOLD you not to eat that last crate of steaks. Did you listen?? 4 sick, 1 dead eating raw meat.Stoopid Barbarians!!

I'm SORRY you just like the dark, pray in the temple for a crate of sunscreen, I can't help you. You like water?? kerplunk!!

I know, I know, what's a gift of 2000 tech points for just to waste now? We already bought out the company store. Can't eat them can we now? We need birth control not points!

You are a Master Farmer and Master Doctor and you are picking berries for 2 points in a famine?? DO THE MATH !

I got 14 Master Farmers hauling in 12 crabs at a time and you pick berries? Vegetarian?? Go pull turnips you turnipseed twerp. Plunk.

NO? Uh uh?? fish and crabs are NOT animal abuse. Kerplunk SPLASH!

You like bees?? We don't got no bees. Yet. Is that an omen?

Yeh we could use a bee hive for honey, but better check your friends about stings and allergies first. Well, just a courtesy.

Laundry again? I don't see anyone running around neked. We got a seamstress job I don't know about?

Diapers yes, but where's all these baby clothes coming from? Some crate you didn't ask if I should open?

What's with the carrying water to the crops again? Didn't you see all the raindancers?? Go fish!! Kerplunk.

Old lady there, who are you telling stories to all alone? They've already heard them 20 times already. NO NO DANCING at your age or it will be your last dance. See? todja, dust to dust.

Anybody know who just died? I don't. Ole Mister Bill will be next slow as he's walking, don't need a crystal ball for that.

Oh sorry little girl, didn't see that mob coming when you found the mushroom. Where did you go? Splat? Oh, you came out the bottom and made it to the bin. Kudos. You should go far in life (if you EVER grow up)